Some Days Are Better Than Others

So, you have been invited out for lunch. Your mission is to get two kids and one husband into the car and drive 45 minutes to your destination.

You spend approximately 2 hours preparing the aforementioned kids for this apparently simple mission.
Your progress is constantly hampered by unforseen poop (and corresponding nappy changes), hunger attacks (and corresponding sick stains), lost toys, misplaced teddies... etc. etc.
Often, by the time you have fed and changed one kid, so much time has passed that the other kid is hungry again. And so the process continues, until you feel slightly panicky. Could it be that you have unwittingly got stuck in a never-ending poop/milk whirlwind that will prevent you from ever leaving the house until you need to draw your pension??

Eventually, a window of opportunity presents itself and you manage to pile husband and kids into the car. With a bit of luck, you may just make it in time for dessert.
One last glance to check that you have not forgotten to strap baby in... and you're off.

You shift the car into first gear, take your foot off the brake, move forward approximately 2 metres and... bang.
You slam right into a passing car. A car that seems to have mysteriously appeared from nowhere. Or which perhaps appeared sometime in between the final "is baby strapped in?" and "did I remember to put a bra on this morning?" checks.

The heart-sinking sound of a headlight shattering. The ominous crunch as bodywork groans.

You switch off the engine and let your head sink into your hands.
You wait, like a condemned woman, as your victim scrambles out of his crumpled car to inspect the damage.

"Maman.." a little voice pipes up from the back. "Caca!"

Yes, they say that something like 90% of car accidents happen within a 5-mile radius of where you live.
But I wonder how many happen within 2 metres of one's own front door?

Let it be said: some days are harder than others.